Emotional intelligence is as valid as mental intelligence, however emotional intelligence is sometimes more important.
Have you witnessed a brawl or an argument at your workplace, neighborhood, or sports event? A heated conflict increases when one or the other or both parties involved refuse to listen to each other and are reluctant to try to make the other understand their feelings and emotions. Emotional intelligence determines how you connect with your social environment. When you’re emotionally literate, you are aware of your emotional state and those of others.
How To Recognize Emotional Illiteracy Around You
Emotional illiteracy drains an individual of all the beyond-reason explanations for their behaviors. They become deprived of the emotional stance they need to maintain harmony with others. The following are symptoms of low emotional IQ:
- Getting into arguments easily
- Refusing to listen to motives and explanations of others
- Oblivious to the emotions of others
- Making innuendos at inappropriate occasions
- Thinking of others as overly sensitive
- Not taking responsibility for one’s actions
- Playing the blame game
- Escaping from emotionally-challenging situations
- Lacking empathy
- Finding hard to maintain relationships and friendships
- Inability to regulate emotions
- Practicing narcissism and victimizing at the same time
5 Top Tips To Become Emotionally Literate And Control Your Life
Poor emotional intelligence can bring chaos in multiple areas of life for most people. Relationships become a wreck and problems seem to add up. But that doesn’t mean emotional intelligence cannot be improved.
It might be difficult at first, but it’s never too late to become emotionally aware. It begins on the inside. Here are some strategies to improve emotional IQ.
1. Practice Emotional Understanding
Emotions have a language of their own. To become emotionally intelligent, the first step is to understand your emotions. Start by profiling each emotion and differentiating them from each other. For instance, try to distinguish sad from overwhelmed. Separate fear from intimidation and so on. Understand what emotions you’re experiencing at specific points in your life and how you respond to them.
2. Find A Name For Your Emotions
For the emotionally illiterate, it’s easier to get caught in the whirlwind of emotional clutter. Recognize an emotional reaction and its particular triggers. Once you familiarize yourself with these triggers you will be able to calm yourself before your emotions erupt.
3. Accept What You’re Feeling
When you’re emotionally intelligent, you don’t deny your feelings and emotions. Own them and consider them a natural part of what it means to be human. Instead of saying to yourself “I’m this…” try using “I’m feeling this…” to give yourself leverage in accepting your emotions and not letting them get out of control.
4. Learn Empathy
Putting yourself in someone else’s shoes is empathy. It allows you to understand different conditions and situations from the perspective of another.
5. Build Emotional Resilience
As a speaker, I’ve had several times when things didn’t turn out in my favor. I didn’t back down, I continued to pursue my goals. I allowed myself the liberty to feel the emotions that were generated by not accomplishing a certain objective and moved on.
Think of bad times as new opportunities to explore and improve emotional maturity. Remember to actually ‘feel’ your emotions, but to not let them get the best of you. Take some time to re-group and come out on the other side as emotionally literate.
